| On a scale of one to dance party.....
DANCE PARTY!!!
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| I just had a deep conversation with robert and it made prompted me to
write out everything thats been going on in my head. We were
talking about how people go through a sort of whore phase where they
basically try to get as much action as possible. I dont think
i've hit that phase yet because if I have, I havnt been very successful
at it. I dont even know how I would respond to a situation where
i was going to fool around with someone I didnt truly care about.
I've always gone by my own moral standards of what's right and what's
wrong rather than those that are imposed on me by my parents or friends
or religion or anything else. Of course they've influenced me in
my beliefs, but i dont consider any of them to be dogmatic.
Anyway, making the distinction between what I want to do and what I
think is right has always been difficult, because doing what I want to
seems like a very emotional response while doing what is right is a
very logical one, because I dont make that distinction in the moment, I
only make it when I can distance myself from the situation and sort of
gain a different perspective on it. That's probably why it's so
much easier to help others than to help myself, because i can look at
other peoples problems from my own seat without being involved in them
directly. That kind of relates to that whole victim outlook that
some people have, where they feel like everything is happening to them
rather than that they are a part of it and have some degree of control
in shaping their own situation. It seems like this is response is
sort of the automatic response when something bad happens to the
person. I know I've personally done this often, but more
recently if I go back and look at everything that happened, it's like i
can point out specific instances or specific things that I said or did
that led to that outcome, but in the moment I don't think about things
in a rational manner, I just go based on emotional response or what
seems like a good idea at the time, like everything is going to fast to
stop and think about what to do next or what just happened. When
people get stuck in this victim attitude, they seems to lose their
ability to analyze their own contribution to whatever outcome it is
that affected them negatively, or even to take responsibility for
things that were mostly their doing.
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| Yay, my birthday started 3 minutes ago! Later this week I'm
probably going to be having a get together of some sort, so give me a
call or leave me a comment if you would like to come.
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| Hey everybody!!! I am back from my awesome adventure in
France. I got back last night at around 10, after not sleeping at
all during the 12 or 14 hours of traveling time. FUN.
Well at least I'm not really jet lagged. I would tell everyone
about my trip, except that it takes sooooo long to type. So if
you want to hear about it, you'll have to actually see me rather than
just reading about it on my xanga. MUAHAHA.
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| Dude, I'm so totally in France right now. Booyah. Chamonix has to be the most beautiful place in the universe. I am so going to move to Europe when I'm older. Internet Cafes are cool. So today I basically went to the top of the french alps. Im taking tons of pictures, which i wont upload since im not cool and dont have a digital camera or scanner, but im going to show to everyone. |
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